Bilingual Family Story: German (Almost) Lost and Found

Contributed by Lois Moore

You asked about speaking German at home...

I am a member of a family that is very proud of its German heritage. My mother and her four siblings and parents all came here together as adults in the 1950s. My oldest cousin was born in Germany, came to the U.S. when he was just a few weeks old, and spoke only German at home. When he started kindergarten, his teacher told my aunt and uncle, "No more German at home!" Times were very different back then. As a result of what had happened to Dieter, none of the rest of us nine cousins were taught German at home and did not grow up bilingual.

However, because our family is so close and so tied to its heritage, many of us cousins were terribly upset as adults that we had not had a chance to learn German at home. As a result, half of the cousins who have children are now raising them bilingual, even though we parents live in three different states and do not speak German! This is quite a challenge--and very expensive. It involves nagging the grandparents endlessly to speak only German to the children, taking the children to German schools (either daily school, Saturday School and/or Sunday School) and buying and using German books, games, CDs and tapes, etc. The Easter Bunny and Santa know the children speak German and always leave German learning materials--and German candy--for them. Fortunately, my daughters are very proud of their bilingual abilities and have already said they will teach their children German, so at least we will not have this problem in the future generation! German Saturday School alone costs our family nearly $1000 per year. The full time German School in our area would be $20,000 a year, which we just cannot afford. My cousin is fortunate that his father pays for the grandson's $13,000 German preschool.

One comment I need to make about the children answering German with English. This was never okay with me because I know too many adults who grew up understanding a second language and not speaking it, so the language was lost to the next generation. My daughters are required to speak, but it is encouraged in positive ways. For example, they have to memorize a Bible verse in German for Sonntag Schule. When they can say it, they receive a sticker from their teacher. After ten stickers, she gives them a prize. They love their prizes and work hard to earn them. Parents could easily do this at home with little poems, prayers, songs and Bible verses. Another technique we use to get the children speaking is they each choose a favorite German song and my mom teaches it to them. Now I hear them every day singing their favorite German songs around the house. A new thing we are trying is "German dinner." My mom comes on Monday nights when my husband is away at a meeting, and my daughters and I can speak only German with Oma. This is a challenge, especially for me since I speak very little! We keep the dictionary on the table so we can look up words my mom has forgotten or never knew because they are too modern.

My friend is raising her children bilingual in German, and their rule is that the brothers must speak German to each other. She spends her entire day saying, "Deutsch! Deutsch! Deutsch!" Her family has not lived in Germany for over 200 years, yet she is completely fluent in German, so the process has worked for many generations.

An idea another friend used was her children told her to correct their behavior in public in German, not English. She used this as a bargaining chip to make them speak German to her during their outings.

One technique I have used to overcome my mother's reluctance to teach the girls German (She's from the U.S.A. melting pot generation) is to make an "Oma's German School" curriculum. Whatever my daughters are learning at their grade level (kindergarten and preschool), Oma is to teach them in German. I leave a different list for her each week with little check off boxes for the days she is here (Mondays and Tuesdays). She always reads three books with them in the two days and helps them memorize their Bible verse and favorite song (one song for each girl per "semester"). Then depending on the week she might work with alphabet flash cards, opposites, shapes, colors, days of the week, months of the year, counting to 100, sequencing numbers cut from a calendar, etc. Sometimes I even have Oma do Alexandra's kindergarten homework with her in German rather than English! Oma and Alexandra also made a German alphabet book this year with 7 to 10 items per page. Alexandra drew the pictures and wrote the words. They did not quite finish, but when it is done I will bind it and then Alexandra will have a German book she can read all by herself.

I hope these ideas are helpful for others. I do envy everyone who is fluent in German and can teach their children themselves. I would encourage everyone to make it a priority to get those kids speaking!

Lois Moore

Alphabet Garten note: Thank you to Lois Moore for sharing her family's story of their journey toward bilingualism.

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